Throughout history and across many cultures, people have regularly built long-term romantic relationships. These connections play a central role in our lives, offering emotional closeness and a sense of belonging. What draws people into these partnerships and keeps them going has long fascinated experts, especially when it comes to understanding what people feel they truly gain from being in love.
Researchers led by Dr. Menelaos Apostolou from the University of Nicosia and the Norwegian University of Science and Technology set out to explore this topic through a detailed two-part study. Their results appeared in the academic journal Evolutionary Psychology, which publishes research about how human behavior may be shaped by our evolutionary past. The study looked into how people describe the benefits of being in a steady romantic relationship and whether these views differ based on gender, age, or current relationship status.
Drawing on the first part of their study, which involved feedback from Greek-speaking participants, the team collected a wide variety of answers about what people see as the perks of being in a relationship. These included emotional comfort, having someone to do things with, physical closeness, and sharing daily responsibilities. Later, these responses were sorted into 10 main categories and placed into two broader groups: those benefits that come from within the relationship, known as intrinsic benefits—personally fulfilling rewards—and those that are shaped by the outside world, referred to as extrinsic benefits, which relate to social or practical gains. The most appreciated aspects were love, happiness, and reliable emotional support from a partner.
People especially valued how relationships made them feel. Most participants pointed to emotions like love, joy, and warmth as the heart of their connection. Alongside these feelings was the comfort of having someone dependable. “I have someone to support me,” one person wrote, showing how much it means to feel cared for and understood. This sentiment was echoed by many, highlighting how essential it is to be emotionally supported by a partner.
Relationships were also seen as bringing real-life benefits. Having a partner often meant fewer social pressures, being more accepted by others, and managing everyday tasks more easily. For example, sharing bills and chores was frequently mentioned. Many people also said that having a close companion helped them feel less lonely and more emotionally healthy. Dr. Apostolou explained, “People considered it beneficial to have someone to keep them company so they did not feel alone,” showing how much a partner’s presence can matter in daily life.
Throughout the findings of Dr. Apostolou’s study, women tended to see more value in romantic relationships compared to men, but overall, people of all backgrounds agreed on the key benefits. Factors such as age or whether someone was currently in a relationship made some difference, but not a major one. Notably, those already in relationships were more likely to rate emotional support highly, likely because they were experiencing that support firsthand.
These insights reveal something important about human behavior. When emotional happiness and feeling supported are regularly described as top benefits, it helps explain why so many people seek out lasting romantic bonds. The researchers suggest that these beliefs may reflect natural tendencies humans have developed to encourage forming strong partnerships that help us thrive and connect with others.
Though Dr. Apostolou and his team’s research focused on a specific group of people, it sets the stage for comparing how romantic relationships are seen in different parts of the world. Ideas about love and partnership are shaped by culture, economic conditions, and what society expects. Still, one truth stands out: people generally don’t just see romantic relationships as a path to romance, but as a deeply valuable part of emotional stability, happiness, and shared living.
Journal Reference
Apostolou M., Christoforou C., Lajunen T.J. “What are Romantic Relationships Good for? An Explorative Analysis of the Perceived Benefits of Being in a Relationship.” Evolutionary Psychology, 2023. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1177/14747049231210245
About the Author
Dr. Menelaos Apostolou is a professor in the Department of Social Sciences at the University of Nicosia in Cyprus. His research focuses on human mating strategies, family dynamics, and the evolutionary roots of behavior. With a background in evolutionary psychology, Dr. Apostolou explores how ancient survival and reproductive pressures shape modern relationships and social interactions. He has authored numerous studies examining topics such as partner selection, emotional well-being, and motivations for maintaining intimate relationships. Known for combining theoretical frameworks with real-world data, his work often highlights how cultural and biological factors interact to influence human behavior. Dr. Apostolou frequently conducts cross-cultural research and has contributed to the academic understanding of why people form long-term bonds and how these partnerships benefit individuals today. Through both qualitative and quantitative studies, he brings clarity to some of the most personal yet universal aspects of human life.
